we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
