I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
