I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
