Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
