I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
