I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize
