i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
