He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
