the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I feel like abortions should bother me more
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
