he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
