There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I could make wine with my vomit
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
