Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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