we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
