spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
