so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Blood and glitter go together right?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
