Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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