I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
