I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
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