Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
The struggles of a small town man whore
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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