It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize