is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize