someone owes me an orgasm
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I'm always down for nudity.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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