why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize