Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize