He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
