Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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