I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
