marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
