Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Reggie can tackle my bush.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
