So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
