I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize