so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Randomize
