yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
