grandma shit on top of the toilet
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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