i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
