Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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