ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
