just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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