take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize