Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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