i just had sex bonerless
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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