it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
