Little spoons don't ask big questions
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
