im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
