everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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