unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
