He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
