I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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