oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize