chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize