Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize