And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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